*showers to avoid responsibilities*
(via humorking)
I relate a lot to babies, because i too am constantly afraid, confused, and unable to express my frustrations effectively.
(via achsure)
*lifts weights so i can carry bigger dogs*
(via whyamisinging)
lets just be clear, if you spend the time baking a cake/cookies/brownies, you can eat as many of them as you want and the calories don’t count. you made those calories. you’re their god.
disclaimer: this does not apply to children you have made
looking at you Kronos
(via fatbabecouncil)
Shout out to all bugs that stay away from me, you rock keep doing what you’re doing
(via trust)
you know, i wumbo, you wumbo, he/she/we wumbo. wumboed, wumboing, wubology, the study of wumbo! its first grade spongebob
(via butchwere)
Things could be worse
Your parents could be turned into pigs, you could be forced into slavery at a bath house, and your boyfriend could be a river
(via lurkbitch)